Stupid rant that I need to get off my chest

Ignore if you'd rather not see it.







I just wanted to say that although it's stupid, I really wanted to go to a dance with you. I wanted to look and feel like a princess with you as my prince, where the dumb dream I had as a kid could come true. I know it's just a bunch of dances that I do nothing at, but it's just something I was really looking forward to. I know there's always senior year, but I wanted to be able to dance with you as a still super idealistic kid before I became a senior and practically a legal adult. It's a dumb fallacy, sure, but I'm just disappointed. There's the word I've been looking for. It hurt watching  a bunch of girls line up outside of Alta for prom pictures. It was awkward explaining why I wasn't going to prom despite being excited about it. It was all disappointment as I heard everyone tell their silly stories about the misadventures they had. And how pretty the sky was that night. Yes, it's dumb, I know. But when did I ever make sense? I'm usually not one for following trends, but as a little girl, this is what I wanted to happen when I was seventeen. I wanted to spend a day with my boyfriend that, at the time, I wasn't sure would ever exist. I wanted to walk into a beautifully lit room where beautiful gowns glittered and dapper suits filled the dance floor. I wanted to waltz with my beloved. I wanted to do all of that. But because I can't, I get to sit here and dream about it. I didn't want to feel stupid that I cried over a dumb night that would probably give me a headache for the next two days. And for one of those nights, I would happily traded Comic con. It sounds extreme, but how do you look a little girl in the eye and say, "That's never going to happen" to her dream? I couldn't. But I did.
And now I feel like I failed her.
And now there's no more dances and just like for Cinderella, midnight is here and her illusion is gone.
No gown. No shoe. And just the tiny hope of a prince.